21 things that should be taught in sex ed class. modified from 11

Posted on Sunday, 22 July 2012

Trans people exist, are not ugly, are the gender they say they are, need support and respect, are human beings, aren’t your fetish objects or porn category, and it’s okay to be trans.
Porn can be really oppressive, and healthier (and funnier and better) sources of porn exist besides videos.
Your sexuality is okay. It is not wrong to be queer in any way. The history of the word queer, the queer movements led by trans women of color. Queer history in different cultures and contexts
Sexualized racism and sexualized racist misogyny and cissexism. For example, the Madonna/Whore complex and how it translates across racial lines (eg Nun/Spicy Latina for Latina women, Mammy/Jezebel for Black women, Delicate Princess/Prostitute for East Asian women).
Desexualization of disabled people, why it’s bullshit, how to counteract desexualization. How disability, including emotional and/or developmental disabilities can relate to sex.
How to actively prevent rape in your circles and combat rape in larger social groups. How men can stop other men from raping. How to control oneself. How to not blame rape victims; how to support rape victims, and the necessity of doing so.
Warning signs of abuse (and not just partner abuse, familial and friendship and parental and other forms of abuse), what abuse victims tell themselves, survival strategies, how to get out of an abusive relationship while it is the safest option, how to support abuse victims, how to not become abusive.
How to effectively communicate, and how to healthily break up/detach. How to keep a relationship going, and how to stop it.
How to be a teenage or young parent. How to raise a child, where to go for help, options. Combating the stigma of teenage parenthood, especially teenage motherhood by WoC. Showing both positive and negative examples of teenage parenthood and being realistic.
Where and when to seek help with relationships and sex. When should you see a doctor, and what kind of information do you need to bring? Where are the trans-friendly doctors in the school’s area? What kind of legal representation should you have if you are disabled and need help communicating to a doctor?
Statistics on everything related to sex. Rates of rape of native women by non-native men; rates of suicide of trans people after sexual assault. Rates of spousal and domestic abuse. Rates of sexually transmitted diseases. Rates of poverty of teen mothers. How long the average teenage sexual relationship lasts. Demographics of different sexualities.
Lube is not evil. It does not mean that you are failing as a sexual partner if your partner needs lube to ease things along. Even if they have a vagina.
Dental dams exist. They are, also, expensive, so microwave proof plastic wrap and modified condoms also work
Sex toys are fine. Experimenting is fine. Stay within your comfort zone, but it’s ok to try new things as well.
Not all people experience sexual attraction, and/or want to have sex. That is fine.
Not all people experience romantic attraction and/or want to have sex. That is fine.
Not all relationships are romantic or sexual, lots of other things exist and are completely valid
Not all relationships are between just two people. That is fine.
Not all relationships look like the classic mom, dad, brother, sister setup, there are all sorts!
It is ok to talk about sex, it is ok to talk about abuse, it is ok to ask questions and talk about anything you are curios about, or don’t know everything about, everyone doesn’t know things and they will certainly stay that way unless they ask.
Pressuring a guy into sex is as much rape as pressuring a girl into it.